I have discovered something surprising in working with many clients that may apply to you, too. Often we find that no matter what the presenting problem may be, the true source of suffering is the unrelenting pressure to be perfect. Although striving for perfection has its benefits, it can be a double-edged sword.
What does the downside of perfectionism look like?
- Fear of failure/Focus on avoiding mistakes
- Sense of self-worth dependent on performance
- Inflexibly high standards, often beyond expectations
- Harsh self-evaluation
- Black and white thinking: perfection vs. failure
- Procrastination
- Work/life imbalance
- Feeling isolated when things go wrong
- Anxiety, depression, alcoholism, eating disorders, suicide
You may have found that having exceptionally high standards is a road map to success, but what happens when you don’t meet your expectations? Is it possible to embrace the positive aspects of perfectionism and leave behind the negative ones?
Yes! I know how difficult it is to seek help and expose your “flaws”, but working collaboratively we can harness your strengths to create a life based on your desires. A life in which you aren’t afraid that making a mistake will lead to rejection or feeling shame. A life in which you can enjoy your relationships, your accomplishments, and feel good about yourself.